I wish I had more time. Or, at least, the ability to multitask with the efficiency of an Intel dual quad-core ( a.k.a., "octo-core" ) Mac Pro. The fact remains that, as I get older, I appear to be more and more interested in...well...more and more things. This isn't what I'd consider to be a new event. I had a similar dilemma as a kid, and I remember hoping that, as time went on, I'd know *exactly* what I'd want to do and be happy with that. Instead, as happy as I am with...

melon

I never really stated this before, probably because I didn't think it would amount to anything, but I was up for an Emmy nomination (Lower Great Lakes/Cleveland regional Emmy nomination, mind you) for "Best On-Air Station Promotion Campaign." Last night was the actual awards show. I didn't attend, mainly because I didn't believe that my chances were all that good and the cost of attending was more than I could reasonably afford (something like $80 a ticket, so taking a guest...

melon

I was reading about "lucid dreaming" the other day, and there is apparently some sort of "checklist" to tell that you're really dreaming:

Reality testing is a common method that people use to determine whether or not they are dreaming. This method involves performing an action with results that are difficult to re-create in a dream. Examples of reality tests include:

* To read some text, look away, and read it again, or to look at...

melon

I haven't had great experiences with them lately, but today ended up being the breaking point. I tend to look at clothes online, then go to the mall. That would be great, in theory, except none of the clothes I find online are at the physical stores of the same name. Isn't that great, eh?

The only two malls that are worthwhile around here are 75 miles apart. I started at the one closest by first (logically). Nothing. So I went to an "upper class" mall 75 miles...

melon

...but I guess that it's probably a good thing. I was officially promoted to "Promotions Producer" today, which is quite the fete for someone who was just a "Production Assistant" from April until yesterday. I guess that'll teach all those companies that ignored and second-guessed me and tried to treat me like your average stupid college graduate. I'm anything, but stupid.

Anyway, so it means I'll be Avid editing full time now, and won't have...

melon

Perhaps I am a bit insane (as if that was ever in question), but I have decided that I want to learn Latin. I've been attracted to languages, in general, since I was younger, but over the last few months, I've wanted to learn a "dead language."

But, mostly, I'm using this as a mental exercise. They always say that old people get dementia, because they stopped using their brain years prior. And now that I'm done with college, I can start learning more irrelevant...

melon

Having read it feels like I've travelled through the meaning of life, which is to say that life has both an abundance of meaning and a complete lack thereof. "Everything" and "nothing" can seemingly co-exist (and also happens to be the paradox of "Brahman" in Hinduism).

I stumbled on this book back when "rougerum" was still here, which seems like an eternity ago, and one day, I asked him about a memorable passage...

melon

A little over a week ago, I submitted two short films (with their scripts) and three short animations for consideration in Emerson College's "EVVY Awards." Yes, I graduated last September, but the timing of my graduation meant that I qualified as a student to submit entries this year.

I've never submitted to anything like it before, but I attended last year. What a spectacle! It's called the largest collegiate awards show of its kind for a reason, and, more importantly,...

melon

...and I wished it was real. It would, thus, have proven that this "reality" was nothing more than a nightmare that I could wake up from.

I had my first "lucid dream" in probably a couple years. I used to have them a lot, but they're also a sign of "restless sleep." So I guess I'd rather have better sleep, so I can be a functional drone in the nightmare that is reality.

But I digress. I had a lucid dream, and...

melon

You've made me very famous, and I thank you
I know you like your pop stars to be exciting
So I bought... these...

Now my time among you is almost at an end
The glory of ZooTV must ascend and take its place
With all the other satellites

Don't fear, for I'll be watching you...

melon

Kind of a morbid memento, but on July 17, 1918, Russian Tsar Nicholas II and his family were killed by the Bolsheviks, essentially starting a new chapter in the Russian Revolution.

Now why do I bring this up? Actually, it's more of a personal reflection (hence why it is in my journal here and not in FYM). I remember when I was 12 and had a fascination with controversial 20th century world leaders. I ended up reading books on Nicholas II, Stalin, and Hitler, most notably, and I...

melon

Well, I exaggerate. I'd like to think I do lots of good deeds, and I don't really do it for the Ayn Rand reason (to feel good about myself) as much as I want others to feel good about themselves. Well, maybe that's a bit Ayn Rand...feeling good about myself about others feeling good about themselves....but I digress.

I befriended a kid out in Arizona when I was a freshman at MSU. I've never met him, but I've chatted with him. He's now in a community college in Arizona, and so...

melon

I feel too old to be arguing on the internet.

Maybe I should resolve my quarter-life crisis by taking the name "Esther." :P

melon

I jumped from listening to primarily Sigur Ros and ambient music to New Order and the Pet Shop Boys. I seem to love all those musical leaps that I do, but I guess I wish I had a coherent, rational reason for it. I don't, but I guess it's good, because I've also been listening to lots of 80s U2. "The Unforgettable Fire" album has been on my rotation lately!

I feel like watching some so completely vapid like "Queer as Folk" right now. My ideological...

melon

I dislike May, traditionally, because this is the month where my entire life ends up in upheaval. School ends, ruining my routine, some friends inevitably move away, and television shows end.

I hadn't watched "Friends" in years, because I found the show to be trite, and I really think they had Ross and Rachel peak too early. They went from a romantic couple to the most fucked up "couple" on television, and, after a while, I lost interest. But...

melon